The road to convocation technically started in April 2006, when I started my first course, but more recently, the reality of having gotten to the end hit home when I received a phone call in mid-May 2010 from James D'Arcy, AU's registrar. He asked if I was planning to attend convocation. Thinking maybe I'd filled out my graduate application form incorrectly, I assured him that,yes, I was planning to attend. At this point, he asked if I would be willing to give the graduate address. I think my oh-so-inspiring response was, "Uh, sure?"

In the weeks to follow, I'll admit I had second thoughts, third thoughts, even fourth thoughts. In my undergrad degree, if I saw "class presentation" on the list of assignments, I would quietly drop the course and find something else that didn't require public speaking, having a history of losing consciousness when forced to speak in front of an audience. Since then, I have gotten better. My job has required that I speak in front of groups, and I've gotten to a place where I can jabber on in front of hundreds of students in a class without too much anxiety. Still, these experiences were radically different from giving a graduate address. I mean, how could I possibly speak for the diverse population that AU has? What could I say that everyone would find something in common with and appreciate? So there were a couple of panic attacks when I'd stop breathing for a bit, but using some positive association techniques that I've used for anxiety stuff before, I brought my mind around to a place where I was actually rather excited about the prospect. Still, what to say?

As it turns out, the speech wrote itself at 3:00 one night. Fortunately, my hand writing was clear enough in the morning, and the thoughts seemed to say what I wanted them to say. There was minimal editing, and I sent the speech off to the registrar before my deadline.

My partner and kid couldn't make the trek to AU with me. Asher was still in school, and I don't know that he would have cared about the ceremony anyway. I know he wouldn't have liked the car trip. Instead, my folks came with me, and we left Brandon almost on time on Tuesday the 8th. We pushed all the way through to Edmonton that day (a long drive when we only had 5 cds to rotate through!), then spent the 9th at the West Ed Mall. It was my first trip there, and I'd never been to a mall so big, so it wasn't surprising that we both opened the mall at 10:00 and closed it at 9:00. Highlights: patting a sting ray (really soft, although the softness is apparently from a shield of mucous that protects them from the water) and getting to have Baskin Robbins chocolate chip ice cream again (hadn't had it since BR closed in Brandon in the early 90's). After closing the mall, we made the drive up to Athabasca, which went surprisingly fast and was really pretty. I was worried that I would have trouble sleeping, but the long day was enough to put me under pretty quickly.

Convocation day itself was incredible. I really felt like I'd won a beauty pageant or something. We ate a first breakfast at the Days Inn, and the breakfast nook was crammed with graduands in their finest and family members with cameras. The excitement was already building, even though most of these people were strangers to each other. When we got to the Multiplex, my folks wandered off to have a second breakfast while I was guided around by a staff person who seemed there just to look after me, which made everything so easy! She got me to the photographer then made sure I met up with the registrar for a review of the morning. The registrar took me into the arena and up onto the stage, showing me my seat, where I could leave my speech, and how to get from the chair to the podium and back. He had a script for me of the morning with more detail than the general program, so I was able to follow along the whole ceremony and know when my turn at the podium was approaching.

I grabbed a quick second breakfast myself then and got my class ring ordered (maybe it seems a little hokey, but hey, how many times am I going to get a master's degree?) before heading off for gowning. Really nice that they had the kneeler there to practice with (really more of a leaner since you'd slip if you actually put your weight on the thing). By some perverse twist of fate, I was the first one in line (the MDE was the first degree and no one else attending had a first name alphabetically before Braun), but the marshals were great and got us lined up in no time, with enough instruction to know how to follow along but not so much instruction that it was confusing. Glenda, who hadn't been feeling well this last year, was able to come sit with us for a bit, and it was so nice to finally meet the invaluable MDE support staff!

Kokopelli, a choir from Edmonton, lead us into the arena, which was really cool. They were an amazing choir, and I'd have been happy if they'd performed even longer. After a couple of welcoming speeches, I was the first across the stage, and I'll admit that I'd kind of forgotten that there would be a video camera, so I was a bit startled to see my face looking back at me from the big projection screen, although it was genius to have the screen there so that all of us on the stage could see what was going on. It was fascinating to get to listen to where everyone had come from and their thoughts on their time at AU. The biographies were really cool. I just wish they were online somewhere so that I could go back and reread some of them.

When my speech time came, I was definitely feeling the anxiety, but once I got to the podium, it settled. Fortunately the gown was long enough that no one could see my knees shaking! There was laughter at the couple of places I'd hoped there would be, and no one laughed when I wasn't expecting it, so that went as well as it possibly could have. It was a huge relief to have the other students' hands go up when I called for some audience participation and asked how many of us had been told by others that they could never do what we had done and get a degree by distance. I didn't think I was the only one to have had that experience, but the speech wouldn't have gone as well if my fellow students hadn't shared that moment with me. After that, I think I got into a bit of a groove, and while I don't think I looked up much at all, I got through and back to my seat without tripping. After the ceremony concluded, we did an MDE picture (I still need to find out if I can order a copy, totally forgot to ask on Thursday).

Afterward, I was completely overwhelmed by the kindness of everyone. So many people came over to shake my hand and compliment me on the speech or to thank me for what I had said. The fellow behind me in the line to return my gown joked that he was standing with an important person, and everyone seemed to recognize me for the rest of the day. I'm used to being a behind-the-scenes person, willing to help but generally never in the spotlight, so all the congratulations and compliments was unexpected and humbling.

We had lunch with the MDE people (faculty and staff as well as the other graduates and their families), and it was a great lunch (and awesome dessert!) with people I'd known for years but had never gotten to sit and chat with. After lunch, I got my hood and a jacket, then we went over to the campus to look around and take some pictures. The first person I met in the doors gave me a curious look and asked if I had given the grad address. Apparently the folks who didn't get to stay for the ceremony went back to their regular jobs and watched the live video stream, which seems like a really clever and kind idea, allowing everyone to watch while still making sure the offices stay open and functioning.

The president's office had invited my folks and I to a dinner celebrating those being inducted into the Order of Athabasca, which I really appreciated (free food was my theme for the day). Again, the lady who met us at the door knew my name, and we were seated at a table right in the middle of the room in front of the podium. At the time, I didn't put the pieces together, although I was surprised that we were sitting with so many important people (among our table mates were Friday's honorary degree recipient and the VP Academic). I'd been expecting a table in the corner and was really just honoured to have been invited. Then, as the President was introducing all the important guests there that evening, he gave me this mischevious grin and started talking about how convocation is really about the students, then launched into a very kind introduction of me before giving me a gorgeous bouquet of roses. Being completely unprepared, I think I blushed the colour of my purple blouse, lol, but it was incredibly kind of them to think of including me and for giving me such a lovely gift.

It was another great meal and even better dessert, and you can see why I felt like I'd won a beauty pageant. The kindness and consideration of everyone, being recognized and congratulated so much, it was absolutely my 15 minutes of fame... and I'm thrilled to have had them.

We got back to Brandon at about 8:00 on Saturday. The flowers survived the two day trip home, after stopping at Ikea for a vase, and are now in our kitchen. I haven't put my parchment into the frame I got just yet, but will hopefully get to that tonight.

To anyone waffling about attending convocation: GO! The people were wonderful, the atmosphere one of celebration, and the memories so much more rich for having been there. It was worth the trip and more.

For anyone who missed it but is interested, I'll be putting my speech up here in the next couple of days as audio and text, once I get a chance to record it. The registrar gave me a link to a sample speech from a few years ago, but I'd have appreciated a few more examples, so I'm sharing in case anyone else is in my shoes next year, wondering what to say.

Finally, thanks to AU for an incredible experience. I'll be keeping in touch!