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More of Pat's Funnies
By Greg Denyes November 14, 2011 - 7:13pm
Aunt Pat sent some more wild ones.... come laugh with me!!!
(minor edits for delivery purposes)
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John was on his deathbed and gasped pitifully. 'Give me one last request, dear, 'he said. 'Of course, John,' his wife said softly. 'Six months after I die,' he said, 'I want you to marry Bob.' 'But I thought you hated Bob,' she said.
With his last breath John said, 'Oh God do I hate him!'
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Thanks again Pat, you rock!!!
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A man goes to see the Rabbi. 'Rabbi, something terrible is happening and I have to talk to you about it.'
The Rabbi asked, 'What's wrong?'
The man replied, 'My wife is poisoning me.'
The Rabbi, very surprised by this, asks, 'How can that be?'
The man then pleads, 'I'm telling you, I'm certain she's poisoning me, what should I do?'
The Rabbi then offers, 'Tell you what. Let me talk to her, I'll see what I can find out and I'll let you know.'
A week later the Rabbi calls the man and says, "I spoke to her on the phone for three hours. You want my advice?' The man said yes and the Rabbi replied,
The Rabbi asked, 'What's wrong?'
The man replied, 'My wife is poisoning me.'
The Rabbi, very surprised by this, asks, 'How can that be?'
The man then pleads, 'I'm telling you, I'm certain she's poisoning me, what should I do?'
The Rabbi then offers, 'Tell you what. Let me talk to her, I'll see what I can find out and I'll let you know.'
A week later the Rabbi calls the man and says, "I spoke to her on the phone for three hours. You want my advice?' The man said yes and the Rabbi replied,
'Take the poison'
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A man goes to a shrink and says, 'Doctor, my wife is unfaithful to me. Every evening, she goes to Larry's bar and picks up men. In fact, she sleeps with anybody who asks her! I'm going crazy. What do you think I should do?'
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A man goes to a shrink and says, 'Doctor, my wife is unfaithful to me. Every evening, she goes to Larry's bar and picks up men. In fact, she sleeps with anybody who asks her! I'm going crazy. What do you think I should do?'
'Relax,' says the Doctor, 'take a deep breath and calm down. Now, tell me,
exactly where is Larry's bar?'
***************************
John was on his deathbed and gasped pitifully. 'Give me one last request, dear, 'he said. 'Of course, John,' his wife said softly. 'Six months after I die,' he said, 'I want you to marry Bob.' 'But I thought you hated Bob,' she said.
With his last breath John said, 'Oh God do I hate him!'
***************************
Thanks again Pat, you rock!!!
---
Friar Greg
Original: https://friargreg.blogspot.com/2011/11/more-of-pats-funnies.html
By: Greg Denyes
Posted: November 14, 2011, 7:13 pm
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